In my previous post I talked about how girls are more inclined to give off, and notice, body signals than guys, and are ALWAYS looking for signs from us guys, as well. Since then a lot of guys have been asking me what we men should do for body language, so this column will give you the answers.
You have to remember that whatever you say, however you gesture your hands, arms, head, and eyes, women are NOT taking your movements at face value. If she jokes with you and you lightly push her away as if to say "Stop", she’s taking that simple gesture as something more: interest, dis-interest, enjoyment, annoyance–any of a million different signals. She’s reading it for further suggestions as to what kind of guy you are, and what your interest in her is. Know that with body language, girls are always reading the way you move and act!
Here are my "Lucky Seven" best ways to show interest:
- The confident eye gaze
- The "Dale Head Drop"
- Smile!
- Open body language
- Lean in to her
- Thumbs in belt
- Touch her
Let’s look at each in more detail:
1. The confident eye gaze
This is how you start your interest. Nothing shows confidence off the bat like meeting a girl’s eyes, and KEEPING YOUR STARE. If you see her look down and smile, you know you’ve made it and the time to approach is now. If she looks away from you but doesn’t smile, give her a shot nonetheless; just the fact that she met your eyes for a second or two shows interest.
2. The Dale Head Drop
So named after the guy who mastered the art of getting women rushing to his side, just with a simple shrug! If you really want to blow away a girl–and show some balls–meet a girl’s eyes, then knowingly drop your head to the side, as if to say, "Hey, you know you want me. Come over here and get me!" I’ve found this to work incredibly well in foreign countries. In the States, the girls tend to be able to see through it a bit more–but it still works!
3. Smile!
It’s often overlooked, but nothing communicates happiness, confidence, and interest in a girl all in one like a nice big smile. Show the girl you’re in control, show her you’re confident, show her you’re a fun guy to be around: brighten the place up with a big smile! And if your teeth need work, then get them fixed! It’s good not just for your chances of meeting a girl, but also for your health and appearance!
4. Open Body Language
So many guys walk or sit with their arms crossed, their legs close together, and their faces anxious and flat. Stop that! Welcome a girl into your world: Have your arms open and leaned back, your legs open and relaxed, your face warm and inviting. You’ll not only attract yourself into a girl’s world, but also into the world of people at a party, club, or bar who can help you meet a future girlfriend–or even wife!
5. Lean in to her
As you’re talking to a girl, especially while seated, show her your interest with confidence by leaning in closer. You don’t want to be a creep, of course, but you can generally tell by a girl’s body language and talk how interested she is in you. If things are looking good, show her your control of the situation–and interest in her–by leaning in and generally getting closer to her. Leaning back does the opposite; it shows you’re unconfident and not overly interested. Not what you want to communicate.
6. Thumbs in belt
Ever put your thumbs in your belt, with your hands at your hips’ side? This is processed as a sign of being confident in one’s sexuality and size. So if you’re standing around at a bar or club and want to convey confidence, this will certainly be understood by girls!
7. Touch her!
Yup, nothing gets you closer to a girl than physical touch. Great conversations and emotional/spiritual chemistry are great, but if you really want to take it to the next level, you’ll have to eventually show some balls and touch her. I’m not talking about grabbing her and making out (unless it really is going that well and she’s flirting out of control!), but doing little things: brushing your arm by her shoulders, lightly massaging her, leading her by the arm to another location in the place. By making a physical connection, you’re giving her a sign loud and clear that you’re confident in yourself and interested in her.
