“I got a natural appetite suppressant: 25 years of marriage.”
–Al Bundy
Al Bundy. Is there any other character out there who better embodies the freedom a man dreams of, from both wife and kids?
It’s no wonder a character like Bundy became so popular. As men, we’re all too aware of the “scheming” women out there–"the redheaded beast," as Al calls Peg. The women who lure us, trap us, fool us into doing the one thing we fear most. The women who have only one goal on their minds, and who are going to do everything possible to achieve it: move in, miss the pill, kickstart the planning with their friends…Yes, we’re talking about the women who want nothing more than a WEDDING. The ring of death. The end that is marriage, achieved by the means of capturing us poor, pitiful guys.
Not every guy minds the idea of marriage (hey, I finally caved in myself), but what we DO loathe is the idea that some woman is going to capture us, trick us into ending our single lives…and forever living the married life. That somehow, marriage won’t be a happily-made choice, but a forced-down-our-throat extortion. Instead of deciding ourselves, the decision is made for us. And worse, with the nightmarish “bridezillas” out there, the fun is OVER: no more nights out with the boys, no more late-night sports, no more non-stop partying. It’s not “happily ever after”, but “MISERABLY ever after”!
Fortunately, attitudes like this ARE changing. This kind of womanly thinking is what’s known as “the old rules”. According to relationship expert, Dr. Barbara DeAngelis, the OLD rule was that, “The goal of a woman’s life is to find a man and get married”. We’ve all seen it. The girls who want nothing more than a MAN, a MAN that’s HERS forever. I automatically think of this girl Melanie I went to school with in the 8th grade. From the EIGHTH GRADE, all the way to high-school GRADUATION, ALL she could talk about was getting married and having kids! Little wonder that the guy she dated in the 11th grade—who she absolutely slaved over–moved back to his native country in the 12th grade!
But thankfully, there are some sane woman, like Dr. DeAngelis. Her book, “The Real rules: How to Find the Right Man for the Real You” is one that we guys should pray ALL girls read! For her, the real rules “won’t just teach you how to get a man—they’ll teach you how to get the right man.” Phew! So we’re not all just targets simply because we’re men.
She also has four “Laws of Love”. The first one is great: “The purpose of your life isn’t to get married. The purpose of your life is to grow into the most loving, fulfilled, real woman you can be.” Amen to that! Even better is the third Law: “Once you have found the right man, the goal shouldn’t be getting him to make the ultimate commitment, but rather, creating a healthy, loving, mutually respectful real relationship.” Building a solid relationship before even thinking about marriage? Who can argue with that! Praise the Lord!
There’s more. Listen to all these wonderful chapter titles in Dr. Angelis’ book:
- Treat Men the Way You Want Them to Treat You
- Remember That Men Need As Much Reassurance as You Do
- Don’t Play Games
- Be Yourself
- If You Like Someone, Let Him Know
- Never Pressure a Man Into Making a Commitment
Wouldn’t it be great if all women followed these “real rules”? If there’s any doubt in your mind that there is a God, this book should change it. There is hope out there for all men, and Dr. DeAngelis is the angel heaven sent to make men’s lives easier. AMEN!