Is time running out for us?<\/p>\n
So many women I talk to, no matter how young they are, have the sense of a ticking hourglass. They feel, deep inside, that if they don't find the right man soon to marry and settle down, the bloom of their youth will have passed and all the single men will have been taken.<\/p>\n
It is such a deep rooted fear for all of us. In the most primal regions of our hearts, we believe that we will die if we don't find love.<\/p>\n
It is only very recent in human history that men and women have been able to live alone. In indigenous societies, complementary male and female roles are vital for survival. Without a man to hunt, there is no food. Without a woman to tend to the home, there is no safe place to return to. A woman with no man has to rely on the goodwill of others to survive.<\/p>\n
Even though we now eat take-out instead of deer, come home to houses instead of shelters, and wash our clothes with machines instead of river rocks, we are not that far removed from our ancestors. Thousands of years of human history cannot be overwritten in a few generations. We were meant <\/em>to pair up. It is such a strong conviction that mere sexual need cannot explain it.<\/p>\n For most of us today, marriage is a choice. We make a living on our own without much difficulty. We don't need <\/em>men. As a result, we can afford to be picky. We can afford to wait until the perfect partner comes along.<\/p>\n Yet we still feel that ticking clock. We feel the need to find love and partner with someone. Even though marriage is a choice, even though the divorce rates are sky-high, we STILL get married in overwhelming numbers. Most of us will marry at least once during our lifetime.<\/p>\n We need marriage. Though some believe that marriage is merely a way to rein in promiscuous behavior and control reproduction, it is too widespread as a human behavior (in nearly all societies across history) to be merely a method of social control.<\/p>\n