Comments on: Eyes Wide Open

By: Harry, Philippines

Harry, Philippines — Thu, 20 Jul 2006 13:02:16 +0000

That’s absolutely the reality! It’s so nice to read it that it makes you realize the things that are sometimes overlooked by lovers and overshadowed by… well, it’s mostly passion and lust, if not love. This article is a very good eye opener, and I’m happy that I was able to read it. Sometimes, we are blinded by so many factors, and we need to be reminded at times for us to “wake up” and see the real picture in front of us.
Thanks Sarah and more power to you!

Harry, Dumaguete City, Philippines

By: Jennifer

Jennifer — Thu, 20 Jul 2006 02:35:50 +0000

This article came at the most opportune time. I am going thru this exact thing right now. This guy that I’ve been involved with this past year is the “Bad Boy.” The awesome attraction or chemistry that we like to call it was definitely there, it radiated from us! At the beginning I believed the things he said, because over the years I’ve learned who I was, and I am a great, and beautiful person. But as soon as he cheated it all went down hill because it brought all the bad memories back from my first boyfriend who cheated. You’re right it is a major loss of a beautiful innocence. I was angry for awhile because I couldn’t believe how blind I was. But the attraction wouldn’t go away and I couldn’t understand it. It doesn’t matter, he still cheats and he continues to tell me what I want to hear and when he cheats on all the girls he tries to have a relationship with. He’s learned how to say the right things to women, and I see how crappy he feels about himself. But he will never change. I kicked him to the curb three months ago when I told him how the whole thing made me feel. He still comes around once in awhile, but he knows nothing will happen anymore with us. I wish I could have that innocence back, that I don’t automatically wonder if they’re telling me what I want to hear or if they mean it. We shouldn’t have that hesitancy, or that mistrust. But it always helps me to understand relationships when I read articles like this. It was a great help, even though deep down I knew it already. I just feel less crazy!

Thanks

Jen

By: Monica

Monica — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 12:17:41 +0000

Ho guys, i hope someone sees this and can reply. i know this isnt the best place for this but i really needed to hear other people view.

Why do men make me feel so stupid. i am really a smart woman but when it comes to men, i become so thick. i do exactly what i shouldnt do and i know it when i am doing it but just cant stop .

I met this guy lately and he is really nice. i really liked him and we had such a great 3 weeks. we did rush things, had sex too soon and went head over heels too soon.

Everything was perfect but unfortunately i set my standards and honestly he doesnt fall into them.i like the gentlemen type,but he opens my car door all the time he drives an okay car and i kinda like a nice car. sometimes i thinki am being picky and materialistic but i have settled for so much less before, and i never was happy in the relationship.

Well, the real problem is i am to school in Septmber and i know i am going to broke. I would like to have a man who can take care of me (materialistic again ) but you know, who wont have a problem with me picking up the check once in a blue moon, or who can take me shopping, or help with my bills . i know i should be depending on me, and i do at the time, i am really looking for someone who doesnt have a problem with helping.

I talked to him about this and he was honest with me. He wont be able to help. i really understood, he has his own bills too and so i should have moved on till i found someone who could. perhaps asking for this kind of help does come out too strong and i should let the relationship settle before? i thought i was being honest and upfront about some of the requirements i am seeking in the relationship?

So anyway, i didnt moved on, we carried on and acted like nothing happened, like we never had the conversation in which i mentioned that the relationship might not be able to go any further. the next couple of days were great and then i brought it up again and since we havent talked for the last week.

I know i turned him off when i told him that i was looking for that someone who could and he has every right to have moved on and found someone else like i should have.
I want him to fight to get me back, to atleast call. and i know that its impractical. obviously, there is nothing to fight for because he cant meet that criteria.

I know all this and yet i still want him and expect him to fight for me? oh man,i feel so stupid. i know i should move on and yet i dont want to. I am busy spending time and energy thinking about him when maybe he is with another woman. he was such a great guy and i wasted it. where do you draw the line between what you want and what he can offer. i guess if he wanted to make it work, we could have come to some agreement and not him not even calling. i keep making excuses for him and i really feel so stupid.

Can someone talk to me and straighten my head out

By: Monica

Monica — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 11:57:44 +0000

i think it might hurt but the truth is, a lot of men do cheat and sadly men cheating is being advertised as a normal process for a man. i think there is nothing wrong with Sarah article but just a few words of advice. everyday we get mails with different situations and such is this. not every article is designed to tell us how to keep a man. this one is on cheating men and its never wise to keep one who has cheated. you are worth more than that. Thanks Sarh for the article and advice. Keeping our eyes open doesnt mean we can enjoy the relationship. we just have to be careful.

By: Bobos

Bobos — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 07:09:52 +0000

I’ve always been aware of ths facts, unfortunately coz of ths i cant ejoy any r/ship i get i get in2, alwayz feel am being cheated on or being lied 2, its a truly very sad state of affairs, coz of ths just cant commit to any1, i jus don wanna get hurt.

By: Khadija

Khadija — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 06:18:00 +0000

Hey wat an interesting topic. although i havent been cheatedin a a relationship but the fact still remains that all wat Sarah is saying is the truth. when it comes to a relationship you really need to put your eyes open and really be carefull but honestly is i truely find out that he is cheating on me i will straight awy walk out from that relationship.thanks for the reminder.

Regard
Khadija

By: whindora

whindora — Tue, 18 Jul 2006 20:38:09 +0000

marion, you have it all wrong. this is the wrong type of guy to play with. i play as well,but with an honest guy. this dude is broken to start with. once a cheat, always one. been there and after playing with the stupid ones, i started seeking nicer men and still playing but NOT in the dangerous and no future building ways that this couple is experiencing. make no mistake, when this woman is alone in her thoughts, she knows what she has got which is NOTHING and him, he’s thinking what a stupid one he’s with and true to his form, thinking of something else soon!been there and so glad i GREW UP and found a good one and stilll playing in a naughty yet healthy way! get it??

By: whindora

whindora — Tue, 18 Jul 2006 20:30:49 +0000

the comment made by marion landan made me laugh and gag at about the same time! listen, to play these stupid little games to try and KEEP your guy is to say the very least,…pathetic! i love to play and have played most of my adult life,but it makes a huge difference when you are playing little games with an overall honest guy first. the guy that marion mentions above seems very broken anyway as on his own wedding day makes advances to another! please ladies…and that his bride thought she was up one on him to invite only trustworthy gal pals?? c’mon now. not to mention the korean chick that plays a bit to make him realize what he has? this is all stupid. i can still play ladies and am quite good at it ONCE

By: marion landan

marion landan — Tue, 18 Jul 2006 16:44:04 +0000

This article simply says you may not be the only woman a man is having sex with. How about some useful advice, like how to cut out the competition without the guy knowing what you’re up to — another words, real techniques for dealing with guys that aren’t faithful. I’ve had a girlfriend who figured out how to do it (rather drastic, she followed and spied on him, caught him in the act with another girlfriend, and broke some of his stuff under this girl’s bedroom window — they’ve been happily married for years, even tho he tried to seduce me at their wedding, didn’t want to tell my girlfriend, so waited several months, found out she presumed he would try and that I was one of the few female friends she could invite to the wedding that wouldn’t give in, she cleverly screens all their acquaintances and keeps his time busy with other stuff, plus gives him lots of sex, energy, fun, etc., also knows what makes him tick, covertly bad mouths other women to him) — s(another technique used by gay males is to figure out the guy’s masturbation fantasy and play to his most powerful sexual needs, to covertly belittle him and undermine his sexual confidence until he feels demoralized trying to chase others — but feels good with himself when with you) (a technique of Korean girlfriend, she lets her husband see other men flirt with her in public places — so he doesn’t wonder too far away when with her) seems you could offer similar advice (other than telling females to leave if you can’t deal with your guy being unfaithful — which is what your article’s conclusion appears to say).

By: Aloma

Aloma — Tue, 18 Jul 2006 16:33:20 +0000

Superb “Eye Opener” .Sometimes we need this pep up articles, so superbly timed too.

Thanks
Aloma